Toffee

I was at a local toffee shoppe the other day tempting my sweet tooth while I waited for my shoes to be cleaned at the cobblers. After surveying all the various kinds this shoppe had to offer I chose one and attempted to tell the toffee maker that I was ready to make a purchase, but he was inattentive to my presence.

I initially made a little wave in his direction to indicate I was ready for him to serve me, but this was useless as he was too concerned with his own world to notice that there was an important customer to attend to. Next I vocalized my displeasure, "Excuse me sir or madam, but I would like to purchase this golden toffee over here!" This actually got an acknowledgment from the oafish individual working the counter; he slightly turned my way, held up his index finger and went back about his business. This displeased me even more, as I do not have the time nor the patience for these types of shenanigans, especially when they come from an inept social outcast whose only joy in life comes from making very busy people be kept waiting while he does nothing of any importance.

I had had enough of him at this point and began to pound on the glass counter, "Excuse me, boy! Douglas is ready to purchase toffee post haste! While you dawdle about thinking of trinkets you will purchase with the tuppence you may earn by the end of the week I am being kept from attending to very important matters and people. I command of you to be courtly enough to momentarily pause what you are doing and ring up my toffee so I can finally be on my way!"

Finally I had gotten this dodo's attention and an actual verbal reply, "I would get to helping you a lot sooner sir, if you would let me finish the current transaction with the woman in front of you." He then turned back to the woman and continued to ignore the fact that I could be on my way if he would get my toffee now. But I wasn't going to let an event like this ruin my casual day about the town, so I left the toffee shoppe knowing the dolt and this louse of a woman would feel shame for how callously they treated me.

Lesson learned; at a low class haberdashery you are likely to be treated with the same insolence on your fifteenth visit as you received on your first.